Time Traveling Toward Enlightenment

My morning meditation started off with my usual opening prayer and then opening myself to the space of nothingness and everything. I have a personal ritual for beginning each meditation, which includes clearing out my "little life," as I like to call it, for the duration of my contemplation.

However, as I was entering the space of complete release and infinite possibility, I was feeling the chill of my bedroom air. I decided to transport my meditating self to someplace warm and comforting, at least energetically. I began to imagine myself on a quiet Caribbean beach; early enough in the day to be before any crowds arrived, and late enough to feel the heat of the sun on my skin and in the sand. I could see a few pelicans off-shore and there were several sailors with their vessels gliding silently across the horizon.

There I was, sitting cross-legged on the beach.......a position someone would have had to help me out of if I were actually doing it in real life.....feeling the toasty beach beneath me; the gentle, warm breeze rushing to greet me; and the sun's rays kissing my body at every exposed spot. It felt like heaven. I had no sooner immersed myself completely into the sensations of my imaginary surroundings when I could feel myself being pulled away from them. Initially, I resisted. "Come on," I said to myself. "Don't leave now. You just got here."

But, I also simultaneously remembered that I had consciously entered the meditation for the purpose of surrendering. So, I joyfully released the image of what I thought my mind wanted and went on a journey.

The pulling sensation was distinctly one of being sucked back in time. I could feel myself moving in reverse through my life, as snippets of situations and events flew by me like images out of Dorothy's window in the Wizard of Oz as the tornado took her aunt and uncle's house for a tumultuous ride.

Finally (which was really a matter of seconds in real time), I landed. I found myself standing at the foot of my father's hospital bed. It was the evening I first went to visit him after he had been electrocuted at his job. My 12 year old back was plastered to the wall opposite his bed. I was stunned. I did not know what to make of the distorted face of the man I dearly loved; the parent I most aligned myself with. I stayed in this place and time for no more than a minute or two. It was long enough for the significance of that particular event to settle deep in my being.

I have know for some time that I became someone different with my father's electrocution. I was the oldest of then six children, later seven, in a working-class family with no reserve resources. The times called for someone to step into the space left by my father's illness and recovery needs. I was best suited for the job; the "next in line," so to speak. Being a typical oldest child, I wanted to please. And, being bright, creative and capable, as well as having lots of energy, I became an adult in a 12 year-old body.

This image and the significance of it was of particular importance to me today. It is not necessary to share why with you. The embodiment of the sights, sounds, smells, feelings, and thoughts in that hospital room, as well as others' expectations of me at that time were critical to my understanding of myself today, at this moment in time.

It has taken me longer to write about this meditation than the actual meditation lasted. The relatively brief biographical movie in my head was powerful; it was also emotionally wrenching and wonderfully freeing. I am reminded that time travel, without agenda or expectation, can help to keep us consciously in the moment. It is important not to refuse to revisit what we must see to allow for our personal shifts.

Happy trails!

The French Connection

I was reminded today of a client I have worked with. She initially came to me for a reading and then has continued her work with me to develop her intuitive skills. I love working with her. What I admire most about her is that she is so enthusiastically engaged in the process of enriching her life by staying in touch with, as she puts it, "The Divine," which, for me, also means her Divine.

One of the primary issues that she focused on in her sessions with me was her relationship with her significant other. This is often where our personal work manifests.

Prior to one of her early visits, I did a meditation to gather information from her energetic field on her behalf. In that meditation, I saw, in mind's eye, one version of herself hovering over another version of herself as she went about her day. It was as if she had a twin that floated like a balloon about 10-12' over her own head. The balloon version went everywhere the grounded one went and the balloon version was taking notes in a journal as she floated along.

When I told my client of this vision, she laughed. She informed me that since the prior session with me (and as a result of things that had transpired in her work with me), she had decided to be a conscious observer of her life, as well as a participant in it. She also shared that she had taken on this role of observer mostly because the relationship she was in was so strained and she, in her usual mind-body ways, had not been able to find a way to make things better with him. So she had decided to become a casual observer of that relationship as a way to attempt to sort things out.

The task of observing everything about the relationship felt a little overwhelming, so she also decided to narrow her focus. She asked for guidance from "The Divine" about exactly what to focus on. She was waiting for her guidance to come in the form of words. She heard nothing. However, she was aware that when she asked for this guidance, she felt a kissing sensation on her cheek. After several failed attempts to get verbal instructions on what to observe, she gave in to the kiss. She would focus only on kissing. She realized that it made some sense, because their kissing patterns were a good indication of how things were between the two of them.

She started to observe who initiated the kisses, how long they lasted, whether one or both of them was preoccupied with something else during the kiss, whether the kisses were accompanied with hugs or other tender touching, or whether they were simply obligatory or on the fly. She watched herself, as well as her significant other, and tried to gather information about what was going on between them based solely on their kissing patterns. She saw when they were more connected and kissing more, and when they were disconnected and kissing less......or in a passing way. Although she was not physically taking notes, as was her "floating balloon self" in my meditation, she was certainly taking mental note of the patterns, as well as her part and his part in each kissing interaction.

After not too long, she saw things about herself and her partner that she had not been mindful of before. This new information shifted her perceptions about what was transpiring between them. She also became aware of the power of a french kiss in their relationship. Although this may not hold true for all relationships, she found that when either of them left for their day of work (or play) and initiated a french kiss, versus a closed-mouth peck, with the other, the two of them stayed more connected through the entire day til they saw each other again in the evening.....and they would also often greeted each other at day's end with another french kiss, which led to more connected evenings. She and her partner were able to discuss this observance and they both became committed to making their "French Connection" a priority.

As a result of her capacity to listen to her intuition, the soft kisses on her cheek.......she became informed of a path to follow.....which gave her insight that both she and her partner (who was willing to listen to her wisdom) could use to bring them back to one another. I love this story and, more particularly, how our higher self knows the little ways to tweak our knowing. May your French Connections be abundant! May the blessings be.